Wednesday 27 July 2011

Wednesday

.....it is a perfect day if you  are able to utilize/internalize the things that one thinks should be thought upon as negative in a positive way. I CAN do that. In the wake of a crazy persons actions, a sick persons outcome and a million other moments that have not gone right, I still feel positive, I still feel inspired, I still feel. Maybe these kinds of events make one look deeper than normal into themselves. Feel deeper into that pocket of life and pull out the lint that is actually still usable and ready for something else.

I woke up at 7am this morning. I made two coffees, one for me and one for my husband. Zelda joined us around 7:30. I showered. I made Zelda lunch and all of our breakfasts. I took Zelda to her activity club and then ran errands. I walked home in the warm rainy mist. I made lunch for Ian and I and then it was time to pick up Zelda.

We took a trip to the house. We learned that the space upstairs in the loft was not going to be large enough to accommodate a shower. After discussing the problem with the builder, we found a solution. We offered to pay for the reworking of the area to make it what we wanted, but he said No!!! He told us he would take the "hit" and that he wanted to do a job that left us happy and and then he could be happy too. No way in France would this ever have been possible. It would always have been our fault and we would have to pay for our mistake. I know. It happened to us in Nice!

I screamed " AHHHHYEEE" when I walked into the house. My gorgeous beast of a range had been installed and it looked fantastic! I can not wait to get my pans/ hands on it! The rain cleared up and the sun came out. The downstairs was filled with a gorgeous sun light and perfumed air from the garden. Zelda and I played little lost kitten in the garden!

Once home, Ian took the cat to the vet. We now have to feed her force fed in order to make her start to eat. She is playing with life number 9 now! So off I go to wrap her in a to well and fill the syringe with food and make her swallow. If this works, she will live also in a perfumed garden, before she departs this world. In the words of a Zen master and my husband..." I bow down to the dust". We will not let her life pass because it is too much effort to make her live. It is too much effort to let her die.

Saturday 23 July 2011

Saturday

Life in Durham could not be more perfect!

The sun shines brightly from noon onwards after a spell of clouds and cool temperatures. As the day goes on, the clouds go away and pure blue sky peeps out and remains until darkness takes over. It is not too hot, I am still wearing a vest, black cotton long sleeve shirt and a cashmere cardigan over lightly velveteen flower patterned leggings. I am at the Botanical gardens with a great friend, her husbands 7 year old daughter and Zelda. WE are picnicking, the girls are running around in the trees, making water bottle terrariums with plants and flowers, finding huge Alice in Wonderland Mushrooms, and screaming TIGER!!!  We are lying on the rug, occasionally glancing upwards, catching a charging child in our laps, eating quiche, chocolate ( 70% dark!) , pears, apples and drinking coffee. It is not difficult to soak up the perfume of the garden, relax into the green green freshly mowed lawns, be lulled to sleep by the sun and the tinkling of the water fountain. I do just that, while Zelda, her friend and my friend take an hour long walk through the trails and forest and plants. After ten days of looking after Zelda alone, this is my ME time and I am so enjoying it!

At 11 am my friend arrived with C and she was in her PJ's, so was Zelda, it was a hoot! The girls ate biscuits, played dress up and barbies and occupied themselves in the garden until the sun put his hat on and it was time to go! We drank tea and coffee and chatted away.

After the gardens we went back to my friends parents house. I love it there. Her parents are so welcoming and genuine. I feel like a part of the family. They are Quakers. I love the Quaker style! I have been intrigued by the Quaker philosophy since reading a book in my book club that had a main character who was a Quaker.

Yesterday was the opening of the new Egyptian Gallery dedicated to Learning for school children. I worked on creating the new learning resources for school for this gallery and helped with the preparations of the gallery itself. The opening was really lovely and I met a lot of nice people. I was proud to be a part of it all. The curator gave  a speech and at the end I was thanked along with the other volunteers who also helped. All I need now is a paying job!

I am feeling still ever positive about living here, ever grateful for being able to live here and ever blessed to be among the beauty of the place, both through the people and its landscape.

THANK YOU!

Friday 15 July 2011

Friday

I think I might be contagious. Lovinn life has bit me and it may just bite you too!

Sit down next to me. Kiss me, smell me, hold my hand. It is alright, I am contagious, but it wont hurt.I promise!

It is raining out. The sky is grey. The drops are small but loud. I love the music. It calms me down and makes me think. It makes me dream. It makes me feel. 

My cat is dying. She is 17 years old and has lived as many lives as one could possibly dream of living. She is a miracle in the making. She Is.

This is a scenario that has happened over and over many times. Approximately 9. I guess it is time. She has traveled from New York City to France by plane. Within France she has lived in three different places. Next she ventured to England, by car! She has had 4 breasts removed, one lump and been force fed with a syringe and by hand. She still lives. That is truly desire to live and to be. To have a perfect day every day til she can not have any more. I will continue to help her to stay here and now. I hope she continues to want to.

I love this cat. If she can think,I think she loves me and loves life as much as I do. As I type these words, the organ music from the ancient church behind my home bellows. It is surprisingly moody and fitting.

On my way to my new house this morning , a squirrel was in the middle of the road. It had been hit by a car. I would say within  5 minutes of my finding it. There was blood around its mouth, otherwise it was in perfect condition, aside from being dead. Many people passed it and made faces, but no one did anything. I looked for a stick so that I could move it out of the middle of the road and onto the side for safety. I cried afterwards. I do not think I have been that close to death before. It was a beautiful creature. Its fur was so soft and silky. Its shape so perfect. Its color, glamorous, and it matched my hair!


Go on, catch this bug. In the face of death, love life. 

Tuesday 5 July 2011

Tuesday

5:45 am  my lovely little Zelda came at me armed with a book, a banana and the words, " is it morning yet?". What a perfect way to start the day!

6:00 am and radio 4 kicked in.

6:15 and my alarm went off.

Ok Ok I was already up!

I went downstairs and played coffee maid and then got into the shower. I was leaving early as I had to be at my volunteer job by 9 am. It was the start of yet another 2 days workshop for two primary schools in Newcastle.

I had a lovely relaxing commute on a big train with lots of room. I drank an espresso and read the paper. Prefect time two!

The day went fine, but I was disappointed in the lack of preparedness by the schools for this workshop. I can not complain, I am just a volunteer, but at the same time I have had an enormous role in the planning of this project and I want it to be as successful as possible. Can you blame a gal for taking her volunteer job seriously???

I rushed to catch the train to get back to Durham in time to get Zelda from School. We then walked to the leisure center for Zelda's swimming lessons. We stopped along the way for an ice cream. A very important pre condition before swimming! I was very impressed to see that Zelda was given an orange cap, and her red one was taken away. She was now in Stage 2. She had moved up a step! I really felt like one of those glowing parents who say " hey, have you seen my kid? Look at my kid, look at my kid". ( said with a Brooklyn accent) Perfect times 3.

After the lesson we walked home. A small explosion occurred when Zelda was told she could not watch any TV tonight due to her behavior last night. I ignored this explosion, and carried on with my cleaning. It worked, it passed and everything was fine. Perfect times 4!

Did I mention that when I was changing Zelda into her swimsuit, I noticed her entire body was scribbled over in blue pen???? I asked,??" " when, where , why? She smiled, said this morning and had no explanation for the Why! Oh well...Anyway, after dinner I scrubbed her stomach and chest with cream and soap. It is not all gone, but it has faded somewhat! I like that she is creative!

I read to zelda, shut out the light and snuggled her to sleep. It took only 15 minutes. Perfect time 5!

Time check: 8:07, a glass of white by my side, and I am happy as could be. A mother today over heard me talking about moving. she got upset and said, " your leaving|?? We are losing you?"  I replied, " No way. I am never leaving. How perfect is that? Pretty damn perfect I say!

Sunday 3 July 2011

Weekend

When life gives you a bloody nose, you gotta get back in the game, hop on the saddle and ride your bike like it never happened. If you do this, the perfect day is yours!

Friday was a very busy day. I went into Newcastle to do my volunteer work , only to find that I was the only one in that day in the entire office! After work I came back to Durham and picked up Zelda and we went to the university for an end of term summer party. I had a great time speaking with Ian's colleagues and was invited by one of them to continue onto the pub afterwards. Ian and Zelda went home and out I went! After the pub we went on to play a short game of pool and then I was in a taxi and home before midnight! I entered the house and Zelda was up as she had had an accident in the night so she joined us in bed and we all slept soundly until the next morning.

Saturday was absolutely gorgeous. Hot and sunny. We had a 10 am appointment with the builder to pick out our work tops for the kitchen. After visits to three shops we finally found what we were looking for. I unfortunately could not get the work top that cost more than gold and had to settle for formica. It was very inexpensive, so in a year or two we will take it off and replace it with gold dust diamond encrusted work surfaces. It's 100% hygienic.

At 12:00 we went over to my brother and sister in laws house. It was the summer fete at the primary school that their son attends and we all went there together. Zelda had a blast. She bounced on the bouncy castle, crawled on her belly two times for the "laser" trail , had a horse ride...I got bitten by the horse as I was paying the one pound for a 30 second ride! I mistakenly held a lolly pop in the other hand and the horse went right for it, missed it and bit me instead! She , Zelda, not the horse, also did an obstacle course where she bounced up on a hop-pity horse. As her cousin was leaning over her to help her get on it she whacked him in the nose! It didn't bleed, but it gave him a shock which led him to  to eat many jelly baby candies!

After the fete we went back to their house for a nice cup of coffee/tea. We were all in the living room watching the newest of Ian's brothers flying invention, when Zelda climbed up the couch and did a sudden flip off of it, herself flying strait off and over the couches top edge to land squarely on her nose! Blood was pouring out! I was unable to hold her little nose properly and my sister in law stepped in to the rescue. She gave Zelda a compress and a small parcel of frozen peas, which Zelda then ate after her nose stopped bleeding! Now that's double tasking. Luckily her nose was not broken and is still nice and small.

That evening Zelda went to sleep very easily. We made and ate our own pizzas, watched a bit of the Dirty Dozen and then went to bed, exhausted! Dealing with blood, even if it isn't your own is very tiring.

Today was a truly magnificent day. 24 degrees, sunny and not a cloud in sight. We decided to pack a picnic and go down by the river. Zelda rode her bicycle all the way there and back. At first she was very scared to ride it and we realized it was because she was afraid of falling and banging her nose again. What she didn't realize was that if she did fall, she would brake an arm, not a nose! This idea did not make her feel any better. After some explanations regarding the phrase " you have to get back on the horse" she promptly changed her mind and rode the bike, fast and furious for the rest of the day! She climbed up hills too and exclaimed " I will not give up"!

Zelda is five. She will not give up. She has spirit and drive. She loves life. She loves herself. I love my life with her in it. So if life gives you blood, make the perfect cocktail!

Thursday 30 June 2011

Thursday

Red,
lime green,
yellow,
blue,
purple and
pink times two
in a perfect arch above my home.
Simply
Perfect

Wednesday 29 June 2011

Wednesday

6am and the radio played classical music. I rolled over and buried my head in the pillow. I wanted more sleep. I got out of bed five minutes later to go to the loo and then rolled up the shades, it was absolutely gorgeous out. Blue blue blue skies, no clouds and lots of sunshine. I had planned on staying home until I had to go to my appointment at the Oriental Museum for 11am, but it was so nice out, I changed my mind.

I jumped into the shower, got dressed in a short sleeved denim dress with leggings and a cashmere red cardigan and little black boots. Ready for anything! Ate two rice crackers with butter and walked with the hubby and Zelda to her school. From there I walked to the new house.

WOW, the builder is amazing. I entered the house and the number of fireplaces had multiplied. In no time at all we went from one to two. He broke away the plaster, hammered out the breeze block and revealed an old brick hearth. He took the mantle and marble from the other fireplace and put it onto this one. Our dining room will now a beautiful decorative hearth where we can burn big candles. Adjacent in the living room area we will be having a wood burning stove installed. winter is going to be very cozy.

Upstairs, the box room has a new wall and the landing is formed and they are getting ready to break through the ceiling to build the loft bedroom en suite. The access to the garage is finished and so is the pantry. Most of the plastering is done, and it looks like marble!

I can not wait to move in. I have only to pick out work surfaces for the kitchen and presto it will be finished. I unfortunately picked out a surface that is close to the cost of gold, so now I must resign myself to Formica for now.

I left the house and walked via a foot path from the house to the Oriental. It took only 5 minutes. This will cut our waking time to 20 minutes to Zeldas school and 15 for Ian to get to work. If I get hired at the Museum I will be at work in 5 minutes! the foot path is through a forest which borders a gorgeous gold course. It is lit by lamps all the way and takes you out to a road that passes many of the university buildings. It is in a perfect location our house.

I had a fantastic meeting and am now preparing the last of the resource materials. The exhibition opens in three weeks.

Instead of going home and then returning again to pick up Zelda, I went into town and took a look through the charity shops. I scored an antique hexagonal bevelled old fashioned wall mirror to put above one of the fire place mantels...£3.99!

I then picked up Zelda and we went home. She had with her the beautiful butterfly painting she had made and I proudly displayed it in the living room. It will look perfect in the new house.

At 6:45 I left to go to the PTA meeting at the court House Pub. We had a great turn out and finalized the details for the Summer Fete.

9pm and the meeting was over. I was asked by three different people if I wanted a lift home. No, no, and no. The evening was fabulous. the light was clear and crisp and so was the air. I walked slowly along the river and took in the calm water with its hints of fading light. I arrived home sooner than anticipated as I did not even notice the steep hills I had to walk up. I was to entranced by the evenings magic.

Time check: 10:06- ready for bed.  It has been an absolutely perfect day. I have had a full day filled with family and personal events, all of which I could not live without! The sky is greying over, but the air is still delightfully light and warm as is my spirit!

Monday 27 June 2011

Monday

If you know where and how to look, you too can have a perfect day!

6am and the radio came on playing classical music.
6:15 and my back up alarm went off.

The sun was streaming in under the so called black out shades and the room felt like I was back in my Nice flat in the height of summer. I asked myself, " am I really in Durham?" Then I had a wave of excitement as today was the launching of the Transition Project that I worked so hard on for the Laing in Newcastle. It was going to be hot and sunny and the activities that were planned for outside would be a success...I could also wear my fabulous vintage Hawaiian summer dress from the 1970's, which up until today lay folded and sad under the bed in a plastic box..boohoo, whoohoo!

I guzzled my coffee, no longer made by the coffee maid, but by me. I got tired of having to remember to bring up milk, fill the cups with the coffee and put water in the machine. When it really does all that by itself, and whistles a tune, maybe I will give it a second chance. I am much happier doing it myself, and it gets me out of bed!

I showered, dressed and then made lunch for my husband and a bagel with butter for myself.

Zelda happily dressed herself and met me downstairs. I gave her a nice hair style, kissed her good bye and caught the bus to the Market Square. I love the walk from the square to the train station. I have about 200 steep steps to climb, a dizzying roundabout to negotiate and then another 200 steps to the inside of the station. By the time I arrive my mind is alert and my body is feeling the "burn".

I bought my ticket and sat in the sunshine with the paper until the 8:13 train arrived. I got a window seat and enjoyed the ride.

I asked myself " where else could my commute be 12 minutes long and full of the most spectacular scenery. I saw gorgeous cattle, cows, sheep and galloping horses. I had a huge smile on my face for the full 12 minutes. I even let out a small giggle. I was thrilled to be me!

9am on the dot and I entered the Laing. Another xxx set of stairs and we were in full swing for today's program. The kids were fantastic. They enjoyed the activities and are looking forward to returning tomorrow. Even though my job is not paid, I get a great deal of satisfaction from it. I love that the children are engaged and that they can not only relate to the art but to me too.  I was touched by their willingness to participate and their eagerness to share their feelings.

2pm and the day ended. I raced to the station to catch the 2:25 back to Durham and then onto Zeldas school where they were having an art exhibition of the students work. We bought an amazing painting of a butterfly for only 7 pounds! Framed and signed by Zelda.

Oh did I mention, on  my walk back, I saw the most balletic Blue Hereon fly and land in the river. It was pure poetry. Commuting is great!

After the show, we took Zelda to the park and then went to some friends for some ice cream. We walked home along the river, up through the woods and behind the old church yard. I got stung by nettles, for the first time ever, but I did not mind. I did not have to walk on any roads, pass any cars or hear any dirty noises. It was a lovely family walk home in peace and beauty.

My husband went to meet a colleague for dinner and Zelda and I snuggled on the couch. She drew some lovely pictures and then we read some books.

She was fast a sleep by 8:45.

Time check: 9:11pm. Back to the blog. Back to sharing my joy. I guess I just needed to keep my happiness to myself for awhile, but its bursting out all over so now its time to let it out again.

So, if you look, listen and live, the perfect day is all around you!

Sunday 8 May 2011

Repeat Business

Somewhere over the rainbow I got lost in my own good time.  The days keep behaving as they always have and the cast of characters in my life keep evolving and I am still enjoying it all.

I am working two days a week at two different museums. One in Durham and one in Newcastle. For the Durham museum I am helping with the redesigning and implementing of new learning resources for the new Egyptian collection. For the museum in Newcastle I am helping to create 30 minute tours for school aged children. Once my CRB clears I will be running workshops with students as well. The greatest part is that I am appreciated, gaining valuable knowledge and still not being paid for it! It's classic, it's perfect. I'm free!

The weather is absolutely glorious. It is warm, sunny, bright, light and sometimes rainy, then sunny, then rainy and again sunny. I am told this is perfect English Summer weather.

Right now, there is a large spider who has taken up residence in the sink. As I type she is spinning a web around the drain hole. She has only 7 legs! I do not know what happened to her eighth. The birds are tweeting and Zelda is having her bath, enjoying the spiders antics. Spiders are good luck, so in the sink drain she shall remain.

Tomorrow we get the keys to our new house. It will be ours. I am nervous to see it without anything inside. I am excited to change it and make it our own. It is not the perfect house, but it has the potential to be. It is good that I am not working full time right now as I have the time to devote to the house. I will start with stripping the wall paper, then ripping up the carpets, getting the garden into shape and cleaning. The builders will not start until middle of June. The work is supposed to be finished by middle of August. I am prepared to move in whilst work is still going on.

It is now 7:32. Zelda is coming out of the bath. It is time to dry her off, read to her and snuggle her to sleep. It has been a lovely Sunday filled with laughter. It has been perfect!

Sunday 17 April 2011

The Weekend

Happiness and perfection breeds laziness. I have been lazy.

All week long the weather has been glorious. I now know what is meant by an English Spring. I am nervous for what an English summer will bring!

We have been planning our building project on the new house and have met with two builders this week. One very expensive, well known for quality work, and their higher prices. The other, a smaller individual business, quality work, and lower prices. We will have to some of the buying ourselves, but this is good. I am looking forward to picking out bathroom and kitchen tiles, fixtures and flooring!

Enough about the week, onto the weekend!

Friday was Zelda's first day of April break from school. We had a mommy daughter day. WE made a broom stick out of a long paper tube and rolled newspaper that was cut on the ends. This was after watching Bed knobs and Broomsticks! We had story telling by Zelda on her bed with every single stuffed toy she owns...took about 30 minutes! We painted pictures outside in the garden. Ate fruit and cheese platters, played with the doll house, read stories and of course snuggled.

In the evening I made a date nite dinner of turkey scallopine, wild brown rice with peas and carrots. Zelda ate the same earlier and loved it! We loved it too.

Saturday morning Zelda came into the room happy as a clam! All day she was bright eyed and bushy tailed. she made out bed. She dressed herself, and put away her clothes. She helped make breakfast and clear up. She was very proud of her achievements. We had swimming lessons at 10:30 and afterwards we went to the Gala to see the new Winnie the Poo movie. We walked home and by the time we arrived it was 4pm!

We all had dinner together. I made Broom House Farms fresh ground Angus Steak burgers with mashed potato and peas, carrots and broccoli. We read, snuggled and Zelda fell asleep in 10 minutes! We followed shortly afterwards.

This morning I woke at 5:45am. My brain would not shut off and I could not sleep. Pre Passover jitters! I am cooking for 15 people, 6 or which are children! All of which are new friends we have recently met, plus my brother in law, his wife and their two boys.

No shower, just two coffees and I was and running to make the brisket. I cooked it with red wine, port, prunes, garlic, ginger, cinnamon, cloves, thyme, orange peel, carrots, onions, celery and veggie stock. I made chopped liver with cognac and the tradition charoseth with apples, walnuts, cranberries, raisins, red wine, Ginger and orange juice. Tomorrow there will be more to make. The Seder is Tuesday.

By 12 noon I was finished! We ate a late breakfast and then hung out in the garden. The hubby and Zelda cleaned it up, he mended Zelda's bike and she rode it around the street. Zelda being the friendly girl thatshe is, called through the fence to the neighbor " HELLO" several times, before the hard of hearing neighbor acknowledged her! She ran across the street to the neighbors, like a cat that had been cooped up inside for days to " play " with them. I had to drag her home as they English are so polite, they would never evict her even though they wanted to eat their dinner! This is definitely the American in her!! Just perfect!!

We all stayed in the garden until around 7:15 then came into snuggle a a bit. Zelda went to bed late, but fell asleep quickly.

I feel once again eternally grateful for the life I lead, for the love I have and the family I share it all with.

Sunday 10 April 2011

The Weekend

Ok Ok, I lost a week, but lets face it, the weeks really are all alike; full of beautiful and inspirational things where ever I turn. I woke up every morning at 6am and did the usual routine things, only this past week I did them on my own as the hubby was home sick. A viral plague has hit Durham and almost every one I know has it or is getting over it.

On to the weekend, as it really was special and quite perfect.

Friday night I met my friend S in town at around 6:30. We walked over to the Cafe Rouge , I know, French, but it is the only place in Town that has outside seating, and is not a pub. It has the bonus feature of being right next to the bridge over the river wear too. What was supposed to be a quick drink and maybe a small bite, turned into a fabulous gab-a-thon, which we both evidently needed. We also went on a hungry splurge and shared steak and duck and frittes. It was 11pm and they were throwing us out. Places close quite early here, but that's OK.

I got into the cab ride from hell and was home by 11:05.

Saturday we went into town in the morning to take Zelda to her first swimming lesson. We were able to watch her from a viewing area. She really enjoyed it and was ear to ear smiles. Afterwards, we walked down to the river and then decided to head home and get the car and go to the Broom House Farms 6 miles away in the country side.  This is a great place where they have a working organic farm, a great cafe with outside table facing a huge farm field with sand pit, swings, hay stacks for climbing on and a wooden castle on top of a mound next to a forest. We ate some lunch and watched Zelda zip around or about 3 hours. Next we went to visit the lambs. They were so cute and innocent. I felt very guilty about the big bag of meat I had bought earlier from the farm butcher.

We were home by 6pm. The evening was quiet and calm, but I got a sunburn on my face.  Never in Nice did I get sunburned. The sun is so low here that it hits you directly in the face.

Today we woke up early and packed a picnic lunch...cheeses, baguettes, fruit, crudites and a small bar of dark chocolate. We packed up the car with our rug, some warm clothes and some  games and headed to South Shields to go to the coastal beaches.

The journey took all of 30 minutes, 18 minutes according to the GPS, but we took a slower route. The coast was truly amazing. It was the perfect beach. The air was full of seaweed smell, I found crab legs and sea shells and beautifully ground down smooth pieces of green glass. Zelda and her dad played in the crags down by the sea and I made sand mermaids. We ate some lunch and then went for a walk up onto the Key, where when we got to the top, it looked like it had been carpeted with beautiful green perfect grass. Zelda was so proud of herself for climbing up the high cavernous rock, and so she should be!

It was getting late so we climbed down and took the coastal walk walk on top of the dunes back tot he car.

It was a marvelous weekend full of beautiful sights that were only 20-30 minutes away. In contrast to living in Nice, we never went anywhere as  it was always too hot to be out in the blazing sun on an open beach, that would be made up of rock, not sand and have garbage and needles on it. Here it had soft and smooth glass and plenty to keep a child or an adult occupied for hours. It was the perfect beach. The perfect weekend, and the perfect family time together.

good night all!

Sunday 3 April 2011

The weekend

 I woke this morning at 7:15 well rested and greeted by a grinning daughter, who could not keep a secret. Today was Mothering Sunday in Britain. She whispered into my ear don't look, we are going to sneak out and make you breakfast in bed. That was followed by my dress worn last night, lying on the floor, being thrown onto my face to keep me from seeing!

I stayed that way until I heard surprise. There in front of me was a large tray with waffles, juice, fruit and coffee. All three of us sat in bed and ate a lovely breakfast chosen and prepared by Zelda. After eating I was presented with gifts and cards. I received a  crocheted pillow in the shape of a heart that said LOVE on it, a lovely magical wooden music box for jewelry. It is the kind that when you open it the fairy inside spins around until you close it or the music ends. Zelda made me a perfect card with butterflies on it and lovely writing saying she loved me inside.

After breakfast, Zelda left, only to return dressed in a princess outfit, donned with fairy wings, a crown, a wand and holding an apple. She put the music box on the bed opened it up and moved in time to the music and in circles to the fairy in the box! A scene to behold...who writes this stuff???? Where does she get it???

We got dressed and ate a bit more and then went to Crook Hall. This is one of my favorite places in Durham City. It is an old mansion with large gardens. We took a family membership for one year so now we  can go whenever we like. It will open for the season in two weeks. Today was just for Mothering Sunday.

Upon entering you are faced with a large hedge maze. Zelda led us through it and out again. We walked through all the secret places and then settled down to have an afternoon tea with scones, ginger cake, flapjacks, cheese sandwiches and of course ea. The sun shone, it rained, it shone and it was all in all great weather.

The grey clouds rolled in around 2:30 and we went home. We found a classic childrens film, Amazons and Swallows and all three of us went up up to watch it.  It was super sunny and bright outside! I can't wait until we can all go camping on the island in the Lake District, like in this film.

Saturday was library day. We took it easy and just relaxed. I read my book The Room and got to bed early.

Friday we got a baby sitter for Zelda and her two cousins H and E. The four adults went out to the pub for dinner and drinks. We got home by 11:30. The evening was gloriously warm. It is great that one can walk to town and back, never having to use the car.

Right now it is a fantastic evening. The sun is setting and the cherry blossom trees out the window are glowing in the evening light. The birds are singing otherwise it is very quiet. Zelda is in bed with her dad who is reading to her and snuggling her to sleep.

I feel loved, happy, grateful, giddy and ready for what ever tomorrow brings!

Thursday 31 March 2011

Thursday

6am wake up with the BBC radio today program. I stayed in bed until 7:15 and then hopped into the shower. I listened to the birds ballads..not the group, but the real mecoy, the sun was bright and the sky was blue, Zelda was next to me being read a book by her daddy from his childhood called The Floppy Frog. Everything felt perfect.

We all ate breakfast together, but it was rushed as Zelda was running late due to an underpant chrisis, which ones to wear! I am really scared for her when she turns a bit older and clothes really matter. I have no idea where she gets it from.????

We made it to school a few minutes late. I had a nice chat with a friend and then went to explore how to start a business here in Durham. It turns out there is a huge initiative to foster entrepenuers/self empllyment so there is a great deal of support. I now have an apointment on Monday to meet with a counsilor to help me get started. She will inform me of all the ins and outs. In two weeks time I will attend for free, a two hour seminar on starting your own business/self employement. Perfect.

I came home on a high. I made a pot of ratatuille for our dinner and then made lunch for my hubby and I, as he was home still sick.

It was incredibly windy here today and we took the car to pick up Zelda. The sun was super hot and strong and the sky was pure blue with no clouds. When we got home, we set the table up outside and had tea and biscuits and then sat in the sun and played and talked all three of us. It was wonderful! It was unusaual. Before we knew it, Zelda had stripped down naked and was running around the back garden! I think she will fit in just fine in the North! Any temperature above 18 and its summer!!! it was a perfect sight.

A bath and then dinner follwed. We all ate as a family. Again, something we rarely do during the week. It was pure magic to all be together and to be able to discuss things. Zelda told us about her routines at school and sang some songs. We practiced her "show and tell" that she has tomorrow at school and then she helped clean up from dinner. Perfect again.

She is now in bed with her daddy reading.

I will play the euromillions lottery tomorrow, but I am already perfectly rich!

Wednesday

6am wake up to BBC radio Today Show. Again, I did not budge until 7:15 when I put on the coffee maid and entered the shower ASAP. I emerged a bit happier, but still tired. For some reason, maybe it being 47, peri menopausal or just the white wine, but this 1 hour forward has my body clock all screwy.  Zelda came in at 7:30, she didn't drink a glass of wine, so it must be me.

I quickly went downstairs to make waffles for us three as I was taking Zelda to school solo this morning due to hubby calling in sick. We all ate and then she and I departed. We sang songs and played eye spy. We arrived in no time at all, but late none the less....as did about 5 other kids..we all had a laugh.

I spent the morning in town running errands and trying to make an eye apointment at  BOOTS. I was astonished to find I could not get an apointment unitl the 7th of April. It seems all of Durham are having eye problems at once. Must be something in the water.

I stopped into the small print gallery/frame shop where one of my friends works to have a chat. The owner was on the front desk, he looked at me and then looked away, never to give me notice again, even when I left and said good by. I felt very reminicent afterwards about my own gallery. How my philosphy was all about talking to people and engaging them to discuss the art works. Making the clients feel welcome. I felt as though perhaps I am to rejoin the art world this way. I must start my own gallery again. If no one is going to pay me, it might as well be me not paying me for all the work I will ldo. I am giving it seriuos thought.

Once home I worked on PTA issues and sent out press releases for the Nearly New sale we are holding in May. Made lunch for me and the hubby and had a short but nice skype session with a friend of mine in Nice.

I picked up Zelda and took her to the park. We did not stay long as a big dark scary threatening cloud rolled in and everyone exited the park like rats on a sinking ship. We took a bus instead of walking home, but it turned outtobe a flse alarm. No real rain came and the cloud just vanished. English weather for you!

I put Zelda to bed with a few books and a snuggle. I then made hamburgers and chips and green beans for our dinner. We watched some television and then went to bed.

Tuesday 29 March 2011

Monday

Monday Monday....I seem to have lost a day when moving the clocks forward and hour because today is Tuesday! Please excuse my lateness, and  although life might be perfect, I surely am not!

Wake up to the 6am BBC radio Today program went un noticed until and hour later. We all slept in until 7:30 on the clock, which is 6:30 in our bodies, which is what we are used to really waking up and moving to. No matter, we all got ready and left the house on time. I think we might be onto something here. When we arrived at Zeldas school the children were just going in so we made it just in time. The head told me that only 14 student were actually there to enter the school, so I guess everyone was behind an hour too. It felt great to be on time on a day when everyone else was falling behind. It was just perfect!

I went for a coffee as usual at the university and then headed home to take care of the domestic arts.

The day was sunny and warm until around 2pm when it all started to go a bit grey around the edges. I didn't mind. I like it that way. I love the feeling of waking and living in an English landscape painting every day of my life. It is perfectly fitting.

The Laing Art Gallery and I made contact and set up an appointment for a day during the April holidays. It is a bit aways, but I can't wait! Keep the fingers crossed and anything else you can manage.

2:30 and I left to go and pick up Zelda. We played in the park for thirty minutes and then bought some bread to feed to the ducks. Zelda decided to eat most of it, but luckily left just enough to satisfy the three ducks that were hungry when we arrived at the river bank.

5pm and we landed on our door step. Waiting in two orange bags were the beautiful fresh vegetables and fruits I had bought at the one green grocer in Durham. They deliver for free. I am no longer going to buy my fruits and veggies at TESCO. Every Monday I will buy what I need for the week of fresh farm produce, pay less and eat better.

Zelda and I snuggled. She ate through the refrigerator, I think she is going through a growth spurt-I hope, and then it  was up to bed. She and her daddy read books and snuggled.

8pm and we sat down to a dinner of wild rocket ( from the green grocers-from Italy) and fresh capeletti with rosemary and butter, and of course some white wine.

10pm and we were off to bed to sleep. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

..ok....it is now Tuesday also, so today went like yesterday. Same wake up routine, but we drove Zelda to school as the hubby has now got a bug and stayed home and worked instead of going into the office. I stayed home too, no errands today, so I could look after him.  Good wife, Good wife..(another mantra). We stayed holed up in the over heated house. I took care of lose ends and he worked. We ate lunch together.

2:30 and I went into town to pick up Zelda. We walked home, no park as it was starting to rain. Once home she watched her videos and made art things. I made her two soft boiled eggs with soldiers which she gobbled up! She got ready for bed, made more art things...really happy she is getting into arts and crafts, and then went up to bed with her dad for books and snuggles.


The leftover chicken casserole is on the stove. I am drinking the last of the white wine and feeling pretty damn perfect!

Monday 28 March 2011

The Weekend

I had a date Friday night.  I made date food. Two sirloin steaks seasoned with crushed black pepper and herb de Provence, sauteed in butter and then deglazed with a red wine reduction. Along side were fritte. I don't remember if I made veggies. It was a mans meal. We drank a bottle of wine and watched the Queen with Helen Mirren. I loved the story. What a strong woman. What a role model, but also how sad her life must have been. I doubt she ever felt that life was perfect.

Saturday I was awakened at 6:30 am by Zelda whispering in my ear Can I watch? I believe I must have nodded yes as she bolted downstairs to turn the TV on to watch CBEEBIES. Again a whisper in my ear can you help me? With what?????? Ok I guess it doesn't really matter what she needed help with, it was 6:45 and I was down there putting on the television, making her toast and warm milk and settling her in on the couch. Nice mommy. Nice mommy. ( a sometimes mantra).

Back upstairs and in bed, the sun was shining into the room, I got back out of bed and put on the coffee maid. We were not disturbed at all so we got to spend some time relaxing in bed and talking and reading. The stuff real people are made of.

9am and I got up to shower. I needed to do the food shopping.  My husband was getting up also, but Zelda stayed in her night gown until it was almost time to go to the party.

2:30 and we were getting into the car. Zelda was dressed up as a Flamenco dancer with pink gloves and jewels to match. She also had a hobby horse. I guess she wanted to "ride into town" when she entered the leisure center where the party was taking place. We convinced her to leave it in the car and make an entrance solo.

All the usual suspects were there. The kids played on the bouncy castle while the adults sat around or stood and talked. I got the chance to speak more with several American women I had met previously at a party. It was a nice social event and the party was lovely.

Zelda fell asleep easily and so did we.

Sunday was glorious. It was the perfect Spring day. We woke up and put the clocks forward. We ate breakfast and we all got dressed. It was sunny and blue and warm. The shadows were long and so was the day. Before breakfast I cooked a gorgeous chicken casserole based on one I had recently eaten at my sister in laws. I Italiancized it by adding pancetta and Italian spices. At 11:30 we walked to Crook Hall, only to find it was still closed, so we turned around and went up to the botanical gardens. We spent the entire day there wandering around the forests, plants and gorgeous daffodils. We played hide and seek and Zelda got lost, but we found her. She did not think she was lost, only looking for the person hiding!

5pm rolled around and we walked back home. It took 45 minutes and Zelda was fantastic. All day on our feet and she never complained. She loves walking. She takes after her mother!

I was dreading bed time because of setting the clocks back. Once home we plopped in front of the TV and watched Nanny Mcfee. We ate the chicken and then it was off to bed. We all fell asleep by 9pm! They say fresh air makes children tired, well it also makes adults tired too.

It was an absolutely perfect weekend and I am still feeling energized by it!

Thursday 24 March 2011

Thursday

6am wake up to BBC today program followed by 6:30 snuggle from Zelda.  Strong black coffee, we ran out of milk, and it took me back to my college/single days when cigarettes and strong caffeine were the item of the day. I pulled back the curtains to reveal a hazy warm morning and showered and then dressed accordingly.

Downstairs to make breakfast and then off to make the school run. We ran into another school mate of Zeldas and his daddy. It turns out they are from Russia, close by to Siberia! He works as a guest professor at the University and have been here for 3 years already. they will leave in another year to go home to Russia.

As we approached the school we ran into our friends L and  S. We had a quick side walk chat and then caught up with Zelda and her friend as they were entering the school gates! I was high on the morning social interactions. It does not take much to make feel giddy and glad. A nice hello, a smile, a sign of kindness and friendship and the rest of the day is perfect!

We arrived at school just on time and then off we went to the university for our ritual espresso macchiato.

I walked slowly home up the hills and then took care of the many tasks on my list pertaining to buying the house, my chair position at Zeldas school and looking for work. I finished the Easter Egg fundraiser competition worksheets and then took a 20 minute nap!

2pm and I went to pick up Zelda. first I printed off over 100 worksheets to be handed out to the school children and then I took Zelda tot he after school coffee club. I hung out with my good friends N and C. We had a great chat and then it was off home.

Zelda and I arrived home at 5pm and then we immediately hooked up on skype with our friends in France. Zelda spoke to Kiara and we spoke to Anthony and Julie. It was emotional and great to see them in real time. We had a glass of wine together and made plans for us to visit.

Zelda is now eating her dinner and then she will be off to  bed. I am drinking a glass of FRENCH red wine and then I will relax with the hubby. A perfect ending to a perfectly perfect day!

Wednesday 23 March 2011

Wednesday

I knew the day was going to be perfect, as I was being served coffee in someone elses bed by my husband at 6:15am in the morning....I have no recall as to what time I transferred from my own bed to Zeldas, but there I was, and soon to be joined by Zelda herself, who, apparently spent the night in my bed. As she entered, she put the BBC radio on for me and climbed on board so I could read her the next chapter of Magic Kitten!  Purrrfect!

The morning followed as usual, shower, prepping of lunch and breakfast then out of the house. This morning we were very early so we had time to dawdle if we wanted. Luck would have it, we ran into one of Zeldas classmates on the way down the hill so we were faster than normal and arrived at her school with 15 minutes to spare! She ran into the yard to play with her friends and never looked back. We of course set out for coffee at the university and had an extra 15 to ourselves together.

After coffee I went into town to take care of details concerning the house and then walked slowly home up the hills in the warm sunshine. As I crossed over the bridge the cherry tree that hangs over onto the end of it was just on the brink of exploding with white and pink blossoms. All I wanted to do was to snap a big branch off and take it home. The flowers grow like weeds in Durham and everyone is tempted to take their own  little bouquet home. Just this weekend a boy was charged 100 pounds for picking daffodils!

Once home I wrote a letter to the Tyne and Wear Museums volunteer coordinator. I introduced my self and told her that I was given her name via the woman I work with at the Baltic. I also attached the updated version of my resume. I hit the send button and hoped for the best.

2:00 I went into town to get Zelda. As I passed over the bridge, the cherry tree blossoms had all opened up and the smell was intoxicating..it was hard not to take a branch or two!

Zelda and I played in the park for an hour and then walked home. I went upstairs to check my emails and there waiting for me was a response from the Tyne and Wear Museums. I opened it and read with disbelief......We want you! I was to call the learning officer next week of the Laing Art Gallery in Newcastle. This is one of the museums I really want to get a job at, and now I am on my way!!!!!!!!! PERFECT PERFECT PERFECT.

Time check-7:54 time to get a glass of wine and celebrate the news with my husband!

Tuesday

6am wake up call via the BBC classical station, followed by sunshine and daffodils, showers ( inside, not out), breakfast and more skipping down the hill and over the bridge to Zeldas school. We made it just as the children were lining up to go  inside. Afterwards I went to the university to have coffee like I used to. My routine, which was altered because of the holiday time is now getting back on track.

Into town to do food shopping, I loaded up my trolley to the brim with yummy things for the week ahead. The shop was empty as the university students are now on break for 6 weeks. With the sun still shining strong I walked home up the hills with my wagon.

11am and I sat down to re do my resume. I have decided that HR/recruitment work is definitely not the direction I want to go as a second choice, so I trimmed down the CV and pumped up the teaching and working with children experience and highlighted my art background. Still no jobs out there, but I am now ready should one come along.

I don't know where the day went, but before I knew it, it was time to go back to town and pick up Zelda. I left earlier than normal so I could enjoy the walk along the river slowly. Zelda was in good form and we went over to the park to play.

"The boys are trying to capture me" exclaimed Zelda as she grabbed my hand and pulled me to the other side of the park, where they were! Oh well, I guess I did not really wish to continue the adult conversation I was having with a friend. Once there, the two of just leaned against the wall, while Zelda made eyes at the boys trying to taunt them! ( her words, not mine).

Soon her friend Y came over and they were both wielding sticks and karate chopping hands. 3:30  and it was time for Y to go to her swimming lesson. We accompanied her and her dad to a cafe to have cold icy frappichino type drinks. It was a lovely and impromptu, just perfect!  WE said our goodbyes and went home.

Zelda snuggled into my arms for the rest of the evening on the couch. She seemed very tired. I must admit that this type of snuggle makes me feel dreamy and relaxed and that there is not a care in the world! I made her some dinner and then we went upstairs for a bed time story and more snuggles. Within 10 minutes she was off to dream land.

I went downstairs to find the hubby home. We ate dinner and snuggled on the couch. More snuggling! Perfect. By 10:15 I was in dream land.

Monday 21 March 2011

Monday

6am wake up to BBC radio classical music..I think it was a spring time sonata...too sleepy to recall. 6:25 and the room was already full of sunlight so I pushed open the curtains and lifted up the blinds to let the spring time shine in. By 6:30 coffee was made by our ever faithful coffee maid and I was well onto my way to one of the most perfect days of the year.

Zelda came waltzing in and climbed into bed for a round of tickle mommy, tickle daddy. I went into the shower and came out happy as a lark. The room was not cold, the house was not cold, I was not cold! Ah the warmth of Spring. I got dressed, put on my make up and went down to prepare the breakfast. The troops came down around 8am and we all ate and then got ready to go out.

Zelda was wearing her spring uniform dress and white knee high socks. This brought back child hood memories, not mine, I never wore white knee highs back then, (but I do now!) I do remember seeing children wearing them in the books I read when I was a young girl, like in The Nancy Drew Mysteries. She refused to wear a coat and in fact she did not need one.

We all skipped into town. It was hard not to have a bounce in your step when the day was so beautiful. The light was bright and clear, the horizon purple and pink and Zelda was hopping from one foot to the other all the way down the hill enjoying the Spring air on her now uncovered legs for the first time in about 8 months. I of course had visions of scraped bloody knees since there were now no coverings. Luckily these were only visions, at least for today.

We ran into our friend S and he did a Lucky Charm Leprechaun jump in the air. The population were obviously high on spring. It seemed everyone was experiencing a perfect moment. 

After dropping off Zelda I walked the husband to Grey College for a conference he was going to. I then walked home in the warmth of the late morning.

Good news came my way when I called the surveyor to explain some of the points regarding the house. He told me that although the report sounded bad, which is what his job is all about, the house in question was actually a good house. In fact, he said it was one of the best examples of one of these types of houses in this area and that we got it for a great price and should definitely not be thinking about looking for a different one. Whew, I can continue to look at decorating magazines and dream about my range cooker!

Still feeling good, I then went into town and met hubby for a lovely lunch at the cathedral cafe and a twirl around the grounds. It was like being back at university and dating again. Spring springs love. I then picked up Zelda and hung out in the park for an hour.

We all walked home together and the night time routine followed as normal.

Zelda is now a sleep, I am blogging once again and drinking a lovely glass of red, yes it's French!

Spring has sprung, and it was perfect!

Sunday 20 March 2011

The weekend

chocolate cake, red wine and espresso, talking into the wee hours of the morning was how last night ended. We spent the evening with some new friends and although we stayed up too late and have been feeling it all day today, it was worth it. C and S grew up in Durham. He is in the music biz and she is in the same art field as I am. Strange, I have never met so many people in one small city all wanting to work in the heritage/art sector.

I spent the weekend drowning my fears regarding our maybe new house at the pub and at home. We received the survey report that we had done and it doesn't look good. There are many problems that need resolving and one of them might be the presence of asbestos, which if that is the case, the buck stops here. In any case the ceilings upstairs are covered in a polystrophome tile and they must be removed as they are a fire hazard regardless of the maybe present asbestos.

Friday night with Zelda in tow we went to  the Old Victorian pub. We stayed until 9pm. Zelda was again a big hit. She wore her red flamenco dress for red nose day. I sported a brand new short hair cut.

The daffodils are out in numbers and taking over Durham city! The moon was huge and these floral creatures could be seen reflecting back off the back of the amazing moon. The sky was unnaturally beautiful and I felt privileged to be standing under it. It truly was Amore!

There are no jobs going at the moment and I am not working on any projects for free currently. It is good as I think I must re-take up my house search and go on many more go sees again.

It is still light out until after 7pm now and the sun rises earlier too. I love the long days.

Friday 18 March 2011

natures reality

The reality is that time flies when your having fun. It flies when you are busy. It flies when you aren't paying attention. It even flies in the face of disaster and change.

Six months have passed to the day that I landed in Newcastle airport. During this time, not only have I changed, but so has the world around me. I have listened to and watched brave people stand up for their rights and over throw a government in order to have freedom in Egypt. Sadly, another group have tried to do the same, but not to the same end, thus far, in Lybia. Two earthquakes have hit, one in New Zealand and the other in Japan. The latter also experiencing a tsunami.

During these past six months, the changes I have faced and made compare very little to what has occurred in nature. I find it very hard to tell my story when right now, as I write people are going through horrible and inhuman atrocities. I am powerless, and for a control freak that hurts!  I find it difficult to comprehend madness in man and nature. I keep trying to find the perfectness in it all, but I am failing.

For me, my life is still beautiful, fun and fantastic, but now there is also a small corner that is cracked with a hair line fracture like a piece of glass after being hit with a small stone. Maybe this is the silver lining. Maybe the pain and sadness I am feeling are good and will help me see things differently. Help me make a difference. Help me to behave differently towards the people I love and the people who are strangers in the street. Help me take more risks or perhaps less where neccessary.

Tonight I will celebrate six months in my favorite pub with my husband and daughter. I will also celebrate life and the reality of  change. That is perfect!

Friday 11 March 2011

and still

Zeldas 5th birthday has come and gone.
The last of the Arab Artist project at BALTIC, has come and gone.
The alarm at 6am every morning, has come and gone.
Laundry, changing linens, towels, and clothes, have come and gone.
Making meals, shopping for food and underpants with kitty cats, have come and gone.
Many showers, baths, and sleeps, have come and gone.
The Cathedral, I pass every day still. Still it is beautiful. Still it changes with every light, cloud and my passing mood.
The river bank still grows, swells and shrinks according to the rain.
The large playing field along side the river bank is sometimes covered in frost, sunshine and now flowers. Still it amazes me with its breath taking strokes of color and light.
My boot heels slowly grow lower with the miles I walk still every day, enjoying still every moment and step I take.
Today was different. Today was still perfect. I worked at the Oriental Museum.
It is raining out still. It was sunny this morning with bright blue skies. Still, I am happy.
The future days will come and go, and still I will love them.

Monday 7 March 2011

The Weekend

Whether you are turning fifty or five, tears seem to be inevitable.  In our case, turning five brought tears to not only the birthday girl, but also some of her guests. It seemed that the noise was just too much...too much fun, too much shouting, running and partying....at fifty, these are things we want to be doing, not saying, " please can you quiet down, I want silence" like Zelda did at the table while eating cake.

Friday was Christmas all over again. I wrapped what seemed like hundreds of presents for Zeldas birthday. Presents arrived from Australia, Scotland and England. I hid them in the garage so little fingers could not find them.

Saturday was spent coloring, cutting and assembling paper foxes, owls and snakes from the story of the Gruffalo. At 4pm I went over to the theater to decorate the room that the party was to take place in after the play on Sunday. I spent an hour and a half setting up the games area, the table for eating cake and the adult sitting space. I hung banners, snakes and a large game of pin the wart on the Gruffalo. I was very satisfied with the finished product. The room looked great.

Sunday morning Zelda crept into our bedroom and we gave her lots of birthday snuggles. I realized though that she was not actually born until ten PM, so even though it was her birthday, it was not her birthday yet. This thought felt very strange and caused a twinge in my belly! It all came clearly back to me. Our miracle baby was one minute inside and the next, outside.

Zelda dressed in her new purple dress, princess sash and crown and party shoes. We all went downstairs and opened presents. She was very happy with all of her gifts, but on in particular knocked her socks off, even if it wasn't a castle! She jumped for joy over the new doll house and four rooms of furnishings.

I jumped for joy too! I could not wait to get my hands on the furniture and start rearranging also...I was silenced to the side lines to be only a consultant and a decorator!  ( when she is asleep, then I will get my chance!)

12:30 rolled around and we piled into the car with the two cakes, balloons and music. WE were off to meet 8 girlfriends at the Gala theater. We took them to see the play of The Gruffalos Child. It was enjoyed by everyone, and thank goodness no one cried or screamed for "MOMMY" because they were scared.

Upstairs at 2:30 for the cake and games. All of the parents joined us at this point and it was a lovely rest of the afternoon. I of course was very stressed the entire time. I felt completely responsible for each and every childs emotional state, and if they were not happy, cranky, whiny or crying, I felt a pang inside.

By 3:30 it was time to clean up and say thank you to the guests and go home and collapse! Unfortunately we could not. Zelda received presents from all of the guests, so it was Christmas again for the second time that day. Everyone was so thoughtful and clearly spent a great deal of time on selecting or making the presents.

In the evening, Zelda exclaimed I am five now, I will put myself to sleep. And she did.

We both promptly put ourselves to bed right afterwards.

Celebrating and sharing with friends and family made this weekend just perfect!

Thursday 3 March 2011

Thursday

Clumsiness, clinginess, sleep deprivation and loss of memory, like where did I just put my hat?, all have one thing in common....ME.

For the 5th night in a row Zelda has come into the bedroom and woken me to snuggle her back to sleep. My darling, of course, sweetie alright, grumble, ok love, go back to your bed- I will take you, you are not coming into mine.......all met with warm tight hugs and unmovable words of how much I am loved....it is hard to say no, so I just go.

So, what kind of a thank you is tripping on the curb, flying across the side walk and skidding on my hands to a halt, while people look on? My body aches, my neck is compressed, my already bad shoulder is hanging limp and my wrist feels like it has been run over by a bicycle. Love definitely hurts! High heel boots don't help matters either.

I am so happy today. I am so glad I went to look at the other house. It was only a few minutes from the house we are buying. It is facing a beautiful field. I saw a sheep on it while in the back yard. The woman kept two chickens, I always wanted chickens. She on the other hand, can keep her house. It was falling apart, run down and not at all what the pictures showed. The road was visible and the noise audible. It did not have the feeling of a well cared for home. She will never get the money she is asking, and now I am certain that the one we are buying is the RIGHT ONE for us. How could I have ever dreamt of straying from the French family who will be our neighbors to be?????

After viewing the house, I received a lovely text from my husband. We met up in town and had an intimate lunch together in a tiny Italian joint. We each had pasta and an espresso. We have never done this before, but we will be working it into our routine for sure.

I stayed in town the entire day. At 3:00 I picked up Zelda and went to the after school coffee club. Our usual companions did not come today. I nursed my wounds at a table by myself for a bit and then another friend of mine arrived and we sat and had a lovely conversation. I had not seen her for some time. Afterwards, Zelda and I caught the bus back home.

I made Zelda her dinner, Teddy Bear Chicken, peas and corn and a bowl of blueberries. We snuggled on the couch and then it was time for bed. Two stories, a bit of Someday My Prince Will Come and snores could be heard. Perfect.

Time check-7:58pm, Zelda happy and a sleep, me sipping some vino and feeling ever so happy and excited about the future!

Wednesday 2 March 2011

Hump Day

All week I have been planning, shopping, sourcing, creating, wrapping, buying and wishing. Yesterday evening one cancellation came in. Not bad, 7 out of 8 friends are coming. Four more days until my baby is no longer a baby, but a little girl. Five years will have passed since her entry into the world. I have less than five days to get her party right. The pressure is on!

Yesterday in the middle of all the birthday hoopla, I found another house, better, bigger, nicer, more beautiful and more expensive. We are in the middle of getting a mortgage for the one we made an offer on. In England you can drop out so long as no contract has been exchanged. This means that right up til the last moment either party can back down, leaving one or more parties to have to start all over again. I feel bad, but I think this new house may be the right house.

On Sunday we visited the other house with my in laws. I did not feel good. I felt sad somehow and not as comfortable as I had in the past. It needs a lot of work to make it what we want. A blank canvas is good, but if I can find one already the way we want, then that is better. I decided to look at the listing on Monday. Bingo, another house, around the corner from the other one. Same area, but better. I have made a RDV to view it tomorrow. We shall see.

Yesterday I met with the old chair of the PTA at Zeldas school to take over the role. I was handed a red box with documents, I felt like a character in Yes Minister! More planning, creating and organizing!

In the middle of all this activity, I am cleaning, cooking , food shopping, bathing, dropping off and picking up and keeping on top of the social calendar.

I feel like a crazy mama getting ready to take office.  Spring has sprung and so have I...up up and away, perfect!

Tuesday 1 March 2011

The Weekend

Sunday Lunch at Rose Tree Inn Pub
The weekend was devoted to hanging out with the family and eating.

Friday Menu
Boiled smoked gammon served with carrots, potato and peas. Home made apple pie for dessert.

This meal was made by my mother in law and sister in law.


Saturday Menu
Appetizer- Rugby served with chips and hummus and vegetable sticks.
Two slow roasted legs of lamb served with mint sauce, mashed potato, green and broad beans. Fresh fruit and cheese for dessert.

This meal was prepared by me.

While the meat was in the oven ( a total of 6 hours), my husband, Zelda and I, all went to the cinema to see Tangled.

Sunday Menu
Big breakfast of scrambled eggs with smoked salmon, croissants, baguette, melon, juice and coffee, followedd by a visit tothe new house.

Late lunch at the pub ( see photo). I ate steak and ale pie with a shortcrust pastry, mixed steamed in season vegies, hand cut chips and a hot brownie with ice cream for dessert.

Friday 25 February 2011

The Missing Days

...Where did I leave off? Senior moments are coming on faster and faster and I just read that walking every day is supposed to help grow a certain part of the brain that helps with memory...I already walk at least 3 miles a day up and down hills, how much more do I need to walk in order to preserve my memories, I mean memory???

Yesterday I not only walked the daily 3 miles, but I also pulled a shopping wagon up the hills full to the brim with food. I had 2 kilos of lamb, 2 kilos of gammon, assorted vegetables, crackers, and fruits. How much memory stick do I get for that effort?

This week has been half term so Zelda went to Sunshine club on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. She has been home the other days as my In-Laws arrived on Wednesday night and will stay until Monday. They are getting more bang for the buck now that their other son has moved here too with his kids and wife. Last night we ate at Molly and Phils. Molly made a beautiful chicken stew. I had 3 helpings! The cousins all played together and then we settled onto the couch to watch Toy Story 2. It was a very nice casual and intimate gathering. We will be repeating it again tonight, but with a gammon joint and boiled veggies.

Yesterday was a truly gorgeous Spring day. It was warm and sunny with just a light breeze, ok wind, but it was still nice and springy! The birds were all out singing in the yard. Zelda played with her grandparents and cousins card games. I enjoyed the scene.

I was again filled with joy by the spring air and the birds in the garden. I hung out with Zelda most of the morning and afternoon. We played games and snuggled and then ate a nice lunch together.

At 3pm we walked to her best friends house and we all went in the car to the Broom Hill Farms, an organic farm that has a butcher, cafe and large playing field with hay stacks, castle, tractors and adventure trail. The area is in the middle of the country side and is as green as green can get with lots of farmy shades in between. We saw huge pigs and baby pigs, sheep, lamb, goats, chickens and geese.

It was starting to get colder and we adults were starting to freeze up, but not the girls, they wanted to keep running around and moving hay from one area to another, run up and down the huge farm field and giggle and hold hands. It was a perfect sight to be part of. Perfect freedom of body and spirit!

Tuesday 22 February 2011

Tuesday

6am wake up call to the BBC radio classical station followed by  news of  an on going political uprising situation, this time in Lybia, while drinking my coffee. 6:50 and I went into the shower. Afterwards, I dressed in the same clothes I had been wearing since  Sunday and went downstairs to make lunches for both my husband and daughter. It eerily felt like Ground Hog Day!

We all left the house together and skipped into town with the grey cloud mist settling on my glasses. The air was warmish and I once again enjoyed the aspect of the Cathedral provided to me this morning in the grey haze.

Zelda happily went to sunshine club and I set off to run the errands in town. I struck out. I could not find the requested red underpants Zelda had asked for, nor could I find suitable knee socks in her size. She has decided to bare her legs like one of her friends from school in the cold of Winter. Perhaps this was a good thing that I wound up empty handed.

A stop into Tesco to buy some food and then the quick paced walk up the hill down the hill, up the hill and home.

10:30 and I was home. I made a cup of coffee and ate the left over cherry pie. Much needed reinforcements for the house cleaning a head. The in-laws are coming tomorrow and I needed to clean all the mould that has been squatting in the shower. I cleaned three bathrooms, one kitchen including an oven, made up the guest room, which included getting into a tackle with a 2 tog king sized quilt and quilt cover. I have saved the vacuuming for tomorrow.

The phone rang at 2:30 and I ran down two flights to get it. It was my best friend in New York calling and we talked for over an hour. It was wonderful to hear her voice and she and her husband will be visiting in the summer. We had not spoken in almost 5 months. Time has passed so quickly since moving here in September. When you are happy, you stop counting the minutes.

I picked Zelda up and we had a slow and painful walk home. All that cleaning and I pulled out my neck. Once home I made her dinner and she watched her programs while I tried to read the New Yorker.  Then it was time for her to have a bath and we played rainbow ponies meet the mermaid whale!

While walking over the bridge today, I saw the same view I always see and felt the same feelings I always feel, relief, happiness, and  lightness of being. It still felt perfect.

Monday

"I love you daddy, I love you mommy, I love all of you and I love myself"  These words were spoken by my soon to be 5 year old daughter. For some it takes a life time to realize and put into practice what she has already come to feel. For others, it never comes. To know that she loves herself made my day perfect.

Nothing more be said.

Sunday 20 February 2011

The Weekend

over indulgence and too much fun leads to hibernation and slightly ill feeling, but other wise it has been a great weekend!

Wednesday 16 February 2011

Wednesday

I woke to rain.
I left the house in mist.
I arrived at the train station and the sun was shining.
I walked to the BALTIC and the river air smelt of sea.
I drank a delicious espresso while gazing out at the Millennium Bridge.
I worked on day three of the Pin Hole Project with a great group of students.
I felt really appreciated by the artist leading the workshop.
I was given the opportunity to explain and demonstrate to the students how to develop their film!
I developed many "black" photos. Perhaps there is beauty in over exposures?
I picked up Zelda and we had a lovely walk home in the moon shine.
I made dinner and snacks and more snacks for Zelda to eat.
We  had a meeting with the builder.
I did not put Zelda to bed, but her daddy did.
I have not made dinner yet, perhaps a delivery of Curry is in order?
I had a great day and feel inspired by the weather, the people, the activities, my family and myself.
Perfect.

Tuesday 15 February 2011

The weekend and then some

...time flies when you are having fun, and I have been having some.

A wine and cheese party given by one of the parents from Zeldas school kicked off the weekend on Friday night. I went by myself, but was certainly not lonely. The hosts were a very lovely couple who owned a most magnificent Victorian row house with high ceilings, roaring fireplaces, enormous rooms you could get lost in a lovely garden. One forgot that we were in the center of the city!

All the guests were parents and there must have been at least 75 people! The table was set with 20 different types of cheeses and wines of every color.  I wore my favorite Cop Copine Dress, it stood out and I received lots of compliments. I talked all night long to all kinds of people. Before I knew, it was almost midnight and I was one of maybe 5 people left. I finally took a cab home and crawled into bed around 1am!

Saturday was Zelda and I day. I took her to the kids club cinema at the Gala theater. We saw Gnomeo and Juliet. A funny animation based on Romeo and Juliet, but with garden gnomes. After we went for a drink and then walked home. Once home we played games the rest of the afternoon. For dinner Zelda and I made the best bolognaise sauce together.  We enjoyed it as a family.

Sunday was spent with extended family. We had tea at my brother in laws house. Zelda played with her two cousins and the adults congregated in the kitchen and talked. It felt really lovely. We went home around 6pm and put Zelda to sleep. It was the end to a perfect weekend.

Monday I began my work at the Baltic in Newcastle. I learned how to make a pin hole camera and develop film. The students we worked with were very nice. It is a great change to working with infants. I am really enjoying working with older students. My accent, which they seem to detect quite quickly and easily seems to make them at ease with me, giving them something to talk to me about.

In the evening, I made a valentines day salad...(beets, rocket, radish, dried cranberries, clementines, goat cheese)  dressed with a red chili dressing, smoked salmon bruschetta on Irish soada bread with capers and venison burgers. A bottle of Chianti to wash it all down.

Today, I had my second day at the Baltic. the group we worked with were year 10s and they were gifted and talented! I did not really notice that about them, but they were very nice, polite and thoughtful. The workshop went very well.

I picked Zelda up from Sunshine club and ran into our babysitter, who walked back home with us.

Right now Zelda is singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to Ian playing the guitar. An absolutely perfect way to end the day!

Friday 11 February 2011

Thursday

 One minute she is a tiger, the next minute a cat, a kitten, a dragon, monster and of course princess cum sleeping beauty.I never tire of morning snuggles from my metamorphosing daughter.....this particular morning she bared her sharp teeth and gnashed at us behind giggles and smiles, I guess she was a happy mommy and daddy eating monster.

We all ate breakfast and then Zelda walked to school with her daddy as I was looking after my 12 year old nephew for a few hours while his parents went to fight for a place in the best comprehensive school in Durham. H helped me make red lentil and ham soup and then he read his book. I paid bills and organized the filing that needed to be done.

At 2:30 I went into town to pick up Zelda and then we went to the after school coffee club at the church. After ingesting massive amounts of chocolate and playing and reading we walked home. I got he dinner ready and she ate ( not much, due to chocolate !) while watching her favorite programs. We snuggled and then got ready for bed and books and snuggles again in her bed.

Our snuggle sessions at bedtime have been fantastic lately. There has been no resistance to falling asleep or turning off the lights. She willingly closes her eyes and curls up next to me and with in 5 minutes is breathing sweetly. I feel immensly connected to her. I have been feeling sad though, as I can feel that as she gets older this kind of thing will happen less and less. I recently realized that I can no longer carry her and pick her up like a small child anymore. Our hugs are no longer forever lasting as I can not hold her for more than a minute at a time. I now know what people mean by it doesn't last long so enjoy it while it does. Soon I will be too big  to sleep next to her. I guess I will have to buy her a double bed!

After Zelda fell a sleep I curled up on the couch in front of the fire and watched bad TV while waiting for my husband to come homeas he was working late. .I felt like a good mother and wife. I felt good inside, I felt satisfied. I felt like every thing was perfect..

Thursday 10 February 2011

Wednesday

Glorious is all I can say.

The morning was sunny and warm.
The walk to school with Zelda was fantastic and fun.
We stopped on the bridge over the river and looked at the sun light shining on the river and making the cathedral glow.
We had a great meeting with the mortgage broker and just got our product before they pulled it!
Had a lovely lunch with a friend for her birthday.
Played in the park with Zelda after school and took in the sight of hundreds of snow drop flowers popping up all over the grass.
Walked the long way home through the old streets.
Went to the PTA meeting and became elected as the chair!
Met my husband afterwards for dinner at the pub.
Came home and snuggled into bed.

All in all, a perfect day!

Tuesday 8 February 2011

Tuesday

buds, glossy buds,
red buds, brown buds, dull buds,
small buds, cone shaped buds, waxy buds,
green buds and shiny buds

two daisy's
I picked one
and left one to grow

hibernation my daughter exclaims is
over

Monday 7 February 2011

Monday

Mother nature must have been very tired today. She was happy and sunny one minute then angry and windy the next. She seemed to cry over nothing then wipe away her tears as fast as they had arrived.

My day, not unlike mother natures, started at 3:30 am to the beckoning cries of Zelda thus I too was very tired. I have a flight or fight mechanism that kicks in when I hear her call for me during my sleep. I jump out of bed so fast I almost don't realize what I am doing. Once the realization hits me, it's too late, I am already in her room climbing up the ladder to her and getting into bed beside her. I have hit the land of no return.

4:30 am I was able to escape and go back to my bed, leaving her with some books to peruse at her early morning leisure. I did not fall back a sleep. She did. The alarm went off at 6am as usual, she got out of bed at 7:30! When I looked in on her she was fast a sleep with her cheek on top of her Miss Naughty book....hmmmmm life immitating art???

8:15 am Zelda and I left the house and made our way to school through the howling wind and spitting rain. We held hands the entire way and walked quietly, taking in the sound of the trees, some singing, some talking and others snoring. The river was wide from the rain and was full of strong currents. I imagined monsters living beneath the murky waters.

After I dropped Zelda off, I dropped my 10 kilos of borrowed cook books off at the library. By this time the sun was out and my walk up the hills were very pleasant...until I came to the dreaded wind magnet bridge. I quickly ran over it as not to get blown off and over the rail onto the busy road below.

I made Gruffalo birthday invitations for Zeldas party, cleaned the cat litter, unloaded the dishwasher, vacuumed the house, made the beds, sorted the recycling and then did some work for the project I will be working on in March.

2:30 came very quickly and I once again battled the winds and walked into town to get Zelda. We took the bus home. I fed her early and put her to bed by 7pm.

Time check-7:32, Zelda still a sleep, the hubby has been home 15 minutes and I am now going to enjoy some quiet time with him. We have a scrabble game to finish, and hopefully I will win with my killer 10 point letter....Z for Zelda, just perfect!

Sunday 6 February 2011

The Weekend

Hooray for fate, for superstition, for leprechauns and rainbows with pots of gold at the end. Hooray hooray hooray.....

Friday morning was not a normal routine morning except for waking up at the same 6am to the same BBC radio station. I showered and then selected some very smart, but still stamped with my own mark, out fit. It had been a long time since I have seem myself dressed in an adult manner. I was lovin my reflection and was hoping the outside world would dig my projection. I had an appointment with the Learning and Access head for the Durham Museums, Durham University.

I ate a quick breakfast and then we were off to walk Zelda to school. It was a grey misty morning and free facials were on offer. As we headed down the hill, off in the distance I noticed a strange orange light on the trees. The objects on the horizon were crystal clear as in a close up photograph, yet these objects were quite far away. I saw the train pass by, people on the bridge, the orange trees and then bang smack in the middle was a rainbow. Immediately I was struck with the notion of luck. Today was going to be my lucky day. Today was going to be lucky for everyone who saw this rainbow. I had two extra bounces in my step all the rest of  the way, and day.

Later on, the day turned into a 60 MPH winds day. I made it to my RDV at the Oriental Museum 30 minutes early. I walked around and looked at the collection. The space was inspiring and I could imagine myself working there.

1pm and S came out to greet me. She was extremely friendly and I immediately felt comfortable. I was introduced to the other member of her team and they explained what they did and then asked me if I would like to work with them! I of course said YES!! This is not a paid position, but a volunteer position. As I mentioned in earlier posts, this is the only way to get a paying job in the cultural sector. Now I am positioned well for a museum job at the university. I start March 8th. Thank you rainbow.

Friday evening we all went out for dinner with the cousins, aunts and uncles to the pub. Zelda had a wonderful time hanging out with the two boys. It gave me glimmers of what it would have been like to have had other children. .....more time to ourselves!

The night ended late and Zelda fell asleep in the car on the way home. We popped her into bed and after a night cap with Ians sister we all went to sleep.

Saturday was an early rise day as Zelda had a whirl wind social calendar. 10am birthday party until noon. A 5:30 engagement for an evening fundraising party with her friend Alba and her family. We were to be on hand in case my brother in law and sister in law needed us and then we had to pick Zelda up at Town Hall for 930pm. We left the party with Zelda around 11pm and Zelda fell a sleep in the car and we popped her into bed, with her party dress on this time. Classic perfect scene...Breakfast at Tiffanies here she comes!

Today we all slept late...until 830am. I made my routine run for croissant, pain au chocolate and baguette for our Sunday breakfast. We took Zelda to ballet class. I busied myself with decorating magazines while the hubby worked and Zelda watched Snow White.

This evening was all about bath, snuggle  and bed.

Time check- 7:52, Zelda is a sleep, my husband is working and I am feeling incredibly lucky. Call it rainbows, luck or witchcraft, i call it perfect!

Thursday 3 February 2011

Thursday

Disappointments and explanations. Two very difficult words to understand, be it an adult or child. They are strong words. When pronounced they carry weight in their consonants and vowels. As a noun or an adjective they are heavy. In time though, they gain lightness and more meaning for those who have had or felt them.

Today was one of those kinds of days, not for me, but for my almost 5 year old daughter. As her mother, I feel what she feels because I have an innate desire to protect her, to incubate her from  those kinds of experiences, yet to the contrary as well, as a mother I must let her have them in order to learn and grow, to feel, judge, understand and ultimately to be able to carry out her own explanations and disappointments.

Trying to explain why one person chooses to be friends with someone and not another was a real challenge. Why can't we be friends with every body? smacked me in the face with her hurt eyes and lack of understanding tears. Her good friend had been invited to another childs house for a play date, and she was excluded. This child is not a good friend of Zeldas, but they are friendly, although Zelda said she does not always play nice with her. This too she could not understand.

I tried many explanations, but the dissapointment did not subside. Finally I decided to put it in terms of something that I knew she really liked, and understood, dessert!  I compared icecream, cookies, cake and lemmon pie. The latter being something she has never really tried, but  still does not want to eat it. This I said was like being friends with people. Some days you want icecream, some days cookies, some days both together and sometimes none of the above. She felt better after this explanation.

More disapointments followed through out the evening and culminated in a screaming fit of sadness. When she was finished, and I again made some more explanations , she was back to her self again.

Right now it is raging with wind and rain. It sounds like the roof is going to blow off. I know it will not. I know tomorrow will be a nice day, with perhaps sunshine, and if not tomorrow soon there after. I hope that Zelda is learning to feel and know these things too.

Time check, 8:52. Zelda fast a sleep on the couch downstairs with the fire going and the lights out. She was trying to stay awake to see her cousins, but there is tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow. They are now living here. Chinese chicken soup and noodles wait in the kitchen to celebrate the start of a new Year. It's all perfect!

Wednesday 2 February 2011

Wednesday

6am wake up to beautiful classical music on BBC radio...I much prefer it to the Today Show.

Coffee arrived bedside by 615.

6:30 and Zelda was bedside too.

No fever.

1am in the morning she woke me up and she had fever. She had to pee. She reminded me of the little cardboard boat that the doctor gave us so she could collect a urine sample. Ok, 1am is as good a time as any! Some how we managed not to wet the entire floor or ourselves.

We arrived at school on time. It was Zeldas first assembly and she had a line. Trucks move slow. What a screen test.  The performance was based on the Aesop Fable The Tortoise and the Hair, never give up even if things are difficult. It was a good message. I guess so was the song about God giving us life, love and baby Jesus! Zelda seems to enjoy it.

I ran the errands in town and went home to make a pot of Hot and Sour Chinese Chicken Soup. It came out stupendous, if I do say so myself. I hope it is not too hot for the rest of the family.

By the time |Zelda and I got home from school, she was running a fever as hot as the soup. I pumped her with paracetamol and settled her on the couch under a blanket. I really hope that she is not getting a kidney infection. The results will be back in a couple of days!

The family, Ians brother, his wife, their 2 kids and Ians sister all arrive tonight around 10pm. The big move has begun. The soup ought to spice up things a bit after 8 hours on the road. A new adventure for the start of the Chinese New Year. I bought long noodles to go in the soup, a traditional food for the New Year. It symbolizes a long and healthy and prosperous year .  May the luck be with them.

Time check- 7:21, Zelda in bed having a snuggle with her daddy, me feeling calm, hopeful and excited to start this perfect new Chinese Year.

Tuesday

I kept Zelda home today from school. She came into our bedroom at 7am, which was nice for all concerned. Once I told her she was staying home she immediately got dressed! Well, she put on tights and socks and slippers and a bathrobe, but kept on her nightgown. She was ready to go downstairs and become a couch potato. I was with her.

We watched three different videos, CBeeBies and did some art and crafts. I was determined to make staying at home as boring and uninteresting as possible. Every hour I left the room to go and do some work upstairs. She did not seem to mind. She was one happy potato.

I catered to her every food whim, which, once presented to her, she tasted, and then abandoned it. I was now eating for two!

At 2:30 Zelda put a sweater on top of her nightgown and we went to the doctors. It was a gorgeous warm afternoon with lots of sunshine. The doctor checked her out and then leaned back in his chair and said so what do you make of it? hey, did I go to med school, are you paying me? I looked quizzically at him and said she has a cough. He agreed. I did not need a brain scientist to tell me this, but I did want the doctor to be the doctor, and not me. This is the 2nd time at this practice I have been asked this. I explained how she had had pneumonia a year ago and it developed from a cough like this. He looked at me like I had 4 eyes and said it was just bad luck.  Ok fine. He saw nothing out of the normal.

Next up, I told him about how she does not like to pee and holds it for days on end...ok not days, but hours and hours. I explained how she had a history of kidney infection and that this worried me. I asked him could he please tell her that it was not healthy. Did he?? No, he said leave her alone, she is bright she will pee when she needs to!

I left the doctors office feeling like a complete neurotic mother stereotype. Luckily it was warm and sunny out still when we left so I quickly forgot how neurotic I am and enjoyed the stroll back home.

We played in the garden for half an hour with the ball, badminton and the watering cans.

1 hour later, Zelda had a high fever again and plopped herself on the couch under a blanket for the rest of the night. I plopped next to her. We were two ploppers.

6pm rolled around and I got her ready for bed. 7pm and she was tucked in tight with her books putting herself to sleep...until daddy came home. He snuggled her and then off she went to dream land.

We ate dinner, looked at mortgages and watched the final episode of the season of Silent Witness. It is not nearly as good as Morse, but I am hooked.

10:30pm and it was nice being home with Zelda tending to her every whim. Now I will tend to mine and go to sleep. x

Monday 31 January 2011

Monday

5:30am and Zelda came in to wake us for a snuggle. She went by way of daddy this time so I could pretend to sleep and not be disturbed, but all to soon the BBC today program came on and it was really time to get up. Coffees, a shower and down stairs I zipped to make lunch for my husband, and breakfast for all three of us. I was in serve mode.

Meanwhile, Zelda was not getting ready and I was getting increasingly stressed. I had decided not to go into work today as Zelda was sick all weekend and I felt instinctively, as you do, that I would have to be home for her early arrival from school. I was not wrong.

1:00 and the call came. Zelda had a high fever and complaining of a headache. It took 20 minutes to get to her and in that time she had a nose bleed and got sick. There she was, sitting on a chair in the office looking really pale and sad. Luckily we got a lift home from the Lolly Pop Man who also drives a taxi!

2pm, and as we entered the house, she was sick again. I reached for a tea towel with one arm and stretched the other to a cabinet where I pulled out a plastic bowl. Here I was doing a juggling act while leading Zelda to the bathroom. I couldn't help but to feel sick myself by this time.

2:30 and Zelda is ensconced on the couch with a Tinkerbell blanket, watching CBeeBies and eating bananas, toast, apples, grapes and drinking mint tea. Most children want to sleep and cuddle when ill, mine wants to be served. Where did I go wrong????

6pm and the grazing finally stopped. It was upstairs for brushing teeth and bedtime routine.

6:30 and we were both snuggled up in bed reading books. I kept saying it was late and she needed rest, but my energizer sick bunny would not hear it. Read me more, tell me stories is all that kept coming out of her mouth when it was time to turn the lights out. I told a story, I tickled/scratched her back...she was just not tired.

7pm, I gave in. I left her with some books to read by herself and put herself to sleep. This is what she wanted instead of the alternative which was me snuggling her with the lights out. At 5 she is so head strong and there are no alternatives but to let her get on with it.

Time check-7:17, I am wondering if she has fallen a sleep yet. I am feeling quite queasy myself. I think I will go and read some books in bed too and put myself to sleep. Perhaps she is on to something! Perfect.

Sunday 30 January 2011

The Weekend

Turning 18 was easy as pie this year. Since it was the second time around, it carried none of the fear of adulthood that comes with turning 18 the first time. Maybe next year I will try sweet 16 again.

Friday morning was full of chores and then into town to pick up Zelda from her after school club. I had 20 minutes to get my self ready for  going out for my birthday. The doorbell rang and it was the babysitter, I was still in my tights and tank and no closer to figuring out what to wear.  I had wanted to wear a dusty pink tulle skirt, but it was clinging to me in strange ways and I opted out.  The door bell rang again and it was our friend with his daughter L. L was spending the night with Zelda while we all went out. I still wasn't ready!! I quickly finished up and left the house with both girls screaming and being chased by the baby sitter.

First stop, the Ole Victorian Pub. We were a group of  about 10 at the pub and it was lovely and lively. I met new people, who are involved in the Museum world. I was given lovely hand made cards, a cook book and a can of cream of chicken soup and flowers!

At 8:30 we went across the road to a great little Tapas bar for dinner. The time flew by so fast and before I knew my friends were having to leave to get back home. I hate it when the party ends.

A brisk walk home and we were a sleep in bed by midnight.

Saturday morning was difficult. I drank only 4 glasses of red wine, two of which were small, but as my husband said, everyone had that much and I am much smaller. I felt like shit! I have decided that I will be going on an alcohol free hiatus  for some time. I also did a few stupid things on Friday night and am glad I have met such nice people who can be my friend anyway!

In the afternoon my husbands sister Anna came for one night on her way to their brothers place to help them pack for their move down to Durham next week. It was great to see Anna as it had been over 2 years since we were last together. Again, I got some super presents, a Tajine, a cook book, 2 beautiful scarves and a book.

Zelda started getting ill and by mid afternoon she had a fever.

At 2am Zelda woke up and I spent the rest of the night keeping her company in bed until I felt ill. 4:30 am and I returned to my bed to finally get some sleep.

Today was very slow. We did not go to Ballet as Zelda was still unwell and we hung around playing with stuffed toys, barbies, and watching the Sound of Music.

I am still not feeling that well and fear I am getting what ever it is that Zelda has.

Time check-7pm, Zelda downstairs in bed with her daddy having snuggles and story. Me, tired, but happy.